I was raised in a poor neighborhood Southeast of Brazil, in a family of heavy drinkers. When I was 4 years old, my father had a heart attack and died at the age of 37. I was told that he was a very violent and abusive alcoholic. It was a rough childhood with lots of struggle and violence, sexual, physical and mental abuse, that brought a lot of pain and fear into my life.
As the old story goes, I started following the “family’s path” and drinking heavily to numb the pain and hopelessness when I was around 12/13 years old. The addiction to alcohol was a big part of my life for many years. Many years of making the wrong decisions and recreating the same dysfunctional patterns that have being in my family for generations and generations.
When I was 26 years old and with a 3-year-old daughter of my own, my family and I finally were able to move to the US after many years of struggle applying for my American visa and always being rejected. By that point, I was so thirsty for a change that I taught myself English in that first year; worked in a variety of different jobs – including house-cleaner and as a prepper that became a painter at an auto body shop; all while taking night classes and being a single parent to my daughter.
Finally, after a few years of hard work, I’ve got my so wanted “9-5 office job.” And it was fun for a while, until it wasn’t. I was still drinking heavily and feeling miserable about myself, my behavior and specially about my health. That’s when I was getting closer to my 30s and something started changing inside of me, I started rethinking my life and my decisions. There was this subtle voice, almost like a whisper, always reminding me of my father’s premature death and showing me how I was following on his footsteps.
I realized that something had to change, or I would end up like my father and just the thought of my little girl losing me to alcohol was unbearable. I knew the pain of growing up without a father, I knew that it was my responsibility to be there for her. It felt like we were stuck in this family cycle that keeps repeating itself until someone literally “wakes up!”
That’s when I started discovering my own spiritual path, my own awakening. I started studying holistic wellness, self-development, spiritual, emotional and physical healing, almost obsessively. After thousands and thousands of hours of research, I am very thankful that fortunately I came across several incredible teachers, books, courses and programs, coaches and spiritual friends that added so much value into my life.
I started working with neuroscience-based tools, plant medicine meditations and studying the incredible metaphysical book A Course in Miracles. All of which have taught me a whole lot about myself, my culture and family history, human behavior and the power of the effect we have on others. So, I’ve made a commitment to myself that I was going to break that family cycle and start to take better care of myself in order to heal myself and support the healing of all those God is bringing into my journey.
The shift on consciousness has been amazing! I’ve learned that there’s a lot of forgiveness and acceptance that we must go through in order to truly be able to love ourselves and all the people around us, so that we’re able to co-create a peaceful and fulfilling life. I’m very grateful for all the guidance the universe gives me and the person I’m becoming every day. I realize that it’s always going to be a work in progress, always asking Spirit for new perspectives to overcome old beliefs and conditionings that don’t serve me anymore. However, now I can just accept myself for who I really am! There’s no need for alcohol to numb reality anymore. I eat very clean, practice yoga and meditation to align mind, body and spirit inviting God’s peace into my life, and it feels amazing to just be alive!
Every day is a gift to treasure and bring out the love and light we all have inside of us, that is why it’s called “the present.” Life is easier when we live and enjoy in the present moment. My intention is to share my life and my experiences with the world along with all the tools I’ve learned along the way, and hopefully be able to inspire all of us to accept ourselves as we are and live our authentic truth, and so then, be able to unlock our full potential to excel as the best version of ourselves to create our best lives!